First deseed dates , roughly cut into small pieces.
Soak dates in ½ cup of warm milk for about 20 minutes.
Take about 8-10 cashews and almonds and soak in warm water for 20 minutes.Peel the almond skin.
In a blender , add soaked dates and blend to a smooth paste ,add little milk (used for soaking ) if needed.
Add soaked cashews, almonds to a blender and blend to smooth paste using milk(used for soaking ),set aside.
Heat 1.5 Tbsp of ghee in kadai / pan , add dates paste and saute for 3-5 minutes. Till moisture goes off and dates slightly thickens.
Add 3 cups of boiled and cooled milk to dates paste , mix well everything and bring to boil.
Add cashew and almonds paste, stir well and cook for 5 minutes on low flame.
Turn off heat , add Chironji , cardamom powder or milk masala powder. Taste dessert,if you need dessert to be more sweet , add 1-2 Tbsp of sugar , mix well.
Serve dates Kheer hot or warm.